being real



maybe you’re reading this to figure out whether we can work together. or maybe you stumbled across the blog and are curious. welcome.

if you read my bio you were probably wondering whether i’m smart enough and skilled enough to ‘get’ you and your situation and to know how to help. wondering whether we’ll have chemistry and  rapport – trust even

i get it. safe spaces – where we can just show up as ourselves with all our cares and contradictions – are rare. the world of work can be a place of constant judgment and measuring up, with leadership development gods sending down their latest commandments from on high on a whim

but the thing is this. i’ve ticked a lot of boxes – as you have – but it’s not who i am, really. many of the things i care most about don’t make it to the list of accomplishments we are required to put out there to ‘prove’ ourselves. plus, life happens, priorities shift: things i cared about yesterday matter less to me today – and vice versa

you too are infinitely complex and mysterious. we will never fully discover all the hopes, fears and dreams that have you turn towards this experience or away from that one. but if we enquire together we will learn things that will help you meet the challenges you face now and will face in the future

your bio doesn’t tell your best stories of love, labour and raw nerve that brought you here now- neither does mine. please see coaching as an invitation to a space where all your stories and parts of yourself are welcome. by bringing all of yourself in we can look at what is needed for the next chapter of your work and life as it unfolds.

come as you are.

“just enough”

i gave some talks at INSEAD events about an important theme in coaching. the story goes like this:

“i don’t have enough time/sleep/money/credentials/network/[insert stuff here] to do this…..”

some wonderful teachers lynn twist and brene brown have given me clues as to the roots of this: we think we don’t have enough (“the myth of scarcity”) because we don’t feel that we are enough (shame and vulnerability)

so if “not enough” is a slogan for our times then “just enough” is my stand against it

i write it for myself, for my family, for my friends, for my clients, for the environment. i am enough. you are enough. the sooner we believe that, the more likely it is that the world and its resources will be enough. let’s make space in our busy, stressed-out days for this thought:

‘what if i am/we are/it is – ‘just enough’? what if all the stories that i have learnt that say i am not doing enough, earning enough, buying enough, BEING enough, are just that: stories? what if i choose to believe another story? then what? do i carry on doing what i am doing, or does my life change?’

happy new year

Chinese New Year

start with why

in simon sinek’s book “start with why” he expands on his TED talk. he uses the ‘golden circle’  to explain the power of starting with the question ‘WHY’ rather than ‘how’ or ‘what’ when trying to inspire others to take action.

the golden circle is also a good way to work on inspiring ourselves to take action and make the changes that will get us ‘unstuck’

so, whatever the coaching issue, whatever the goals you come with, we start with’WHY is that important?’ the answer to this becomes your purpose statement.

then we focus on ‘HOW do I bring that purpose to life?’ these will be the strategic skills that we will work on developing.

finally, we look at ‘WHAT might we expect or hope to see as that happens?’  the answer to this becomes the outcomes that we will work towards

thinking and linking

here you will find resources that underpin our thinking about developmental programmes.

as we are now blessed with lots of information but seemingly less time, i try to keep these short (but with the occasional ‘deep dive’ for those interested) and to be more of a curator than a creator.

i’m a great admirer of lawrence lessig and his work with creative commons licences and love the innovation that comes when ideas are fed and grown by others so where i do include work created specifically by bamboo, i’m happy for it to be shared with attribution and hopefully ‘go forth and multiply’ and be useful in the world.